Bad Girls With No Mothers

I can't believe it. I dont' understand how she could do it. We were all sleeping when The door slammed open. I heard Ching Wu shriek and scream. It was pouring and dark, I could only see silhouettes until the flashes of lightening revealed Ying Ma and Chai Su carrying Ching Wu as she twisted and screamed out the door. I was confused on what was going on. Everyone had awoken at this point. Ah Wei and Ah Ying were crying and they huddled close to So So. I ran towards Chai Su and pulled his arm and shrieked "Stop it! Where are you taking her?"
I dig my nails deeper into his forearm. He yelled and dropped Ching Wu's legs on to the floor. He took the back of his hand and slapped me so hard I fell to the ground.

I froze for a second and watched Ching Wu out the door. I frantically got up and ran towards them. I must help Ching Wu... I must save her. But my momentary pause was too late. I saw Ying Ma and Chai Su at the edge of the boat. They swung their arms and Ching Wu flew into the air. I watched as her body fell. Then all I could see was black.

Ying Ma turned around and saw me standing there. She darted towards me. My mind told me to run but I was frozen. My eyes were trying to find Ching Wu, but I knew I would never find her. Ying Ma took her right hand and cuffed my chin; pinching my cheeks into my teeth. "GET BACK INTO THE ROOM."
Without letting go of my face she dragged me to the door then threw me onto the floor. "That is what happens to bad girls with no mothers. You leave this room again without my permission, it'll be you that gets the chuck"

Better

Chai Su no longer puts honey on himself. We all do our job and everything is easier. I feel like Ying Ma is proud of me I like it when she pats me on the head and says "good girl" I still don't really like what I'm doing but at least I don't get beat anymore. Ching Wu still gets beat a lot though. She doesn't talk much anymore and I can barely see her right eye. Its so swollen and bruised. I'm not sure why she doesn't do as she is told, then she won't get hurt anymore and she can eat too. She stop talking to all of us really not just Chai Su and Ying Ma. When we are all alone she just sits quietly at the corner of the room and stairs off aimlessly. I once walked over and touched her shoulder. she quickly pulled away and told me to fuck off. I wish we could be friends but at least I have So So. Shes my age so we understand each other I think. Ah Wei and Ah Ying are like my baby sisters. I think its nice to have sisters.

The other day I over heard Ying Ma say that we have a few days before we reach... somewhere. Shes happy that most of us has trained well. She then said Ching Wu was too old and too stubborn or something. not..suitable? Something about taking care of her soon.

Sick

It's been a while since I've talked about my journey. I apologize I have been quite ill. After some more training sessions like that of spoke of in my previous entry, well, I threw up every time. Ying Ma would hit me every time I did it too. She smushed my face in my own sick sometimes . Chai Su was the man we were training on. He also hit me sometimes too. I had a fever on the third day. I still had to train. Ying Ma would also force me to eat these pills. When my fever wouldn't go down on the fourth day, she and Chai Su threw me in a box full of cold water. It felt like a sharp blade going through my body. I remember screaming and screaming and thrashing to get out, but Chai Su and Ying Ma kept holding me down. I was so tired that I just sunk in and fell asleep. I woke up warm. I was wrapped around a blanket and sleeping against Ying Ma. As I slowly wake, Ying Ma took her hand and stroked my hair away from my face. I looked up and she smiled, "Now aren't you feeling better sweety?" Looking at her while she gently held me, my heart was filled with this feeling I haven't felt in a long while. It was like I wanted her like I wanted this moment forever with her. It felt so safe, felt so warm. I wonder if she felt the same.

Private

"What you doing?" Ching Wu screeched as she jumped up from the floor.
The man stood facing us with his lower half of his body exposed. I never seen anyone naked before. Especially not a man. I was .....shocked... confused. I wasn't sure how to feel. The rest of the girls and I huddled together. I didn't know where to look. What should I do? What am i suppose to do?
Ying Ma started to speak to Ching Wu. "Well honey, you seem soooo excited! Why don't you start first" She grabbed the honey bottle off the table, opened to top of the bottle and squeezed the honey onto the man's privates. "I'm sure you're hungry"
What was she saying? I didn't understand. What is going on? Why is she pouring honey on him? Is she suggesting we eat him? bite him?
"Stop that! What are you doing? STOP" Ching Wu screamed.
"Get over here girl" said the man.
Shaking her head Ching Wu said "No." Ying Ma walked over and grabbed her by her neck and pulled her toward the man. "Let GO of me? What you doing?" Ying Ma forced her in front of the man.
"On your knees girl" said the man
"no" Ching Wu whispered
"I said on your KNEES" He grabbed her hair and forced her to the ground.
"Suck it off" Ching Wu stared at him, confused and frustrated.
"No"
"Girl aren't you hungry? It's nice and sweet"
"No"
He slapped her hard. Her whole body flung to the ground. He proceeded to kick and stomp her several times. He got on his knees and grabbed her face, squeezing her cheeks bone together pushing her lips apart.
"No one was asking" He slammed her head onto the floor. Ching Wu groaned and rolled over. I saw her face blood was spattered all over her. Ah Wei screamed. I was frozen. What do I do?

"Get up" grunted Ying Ma. The man was standing now, hands at his hip. "GET UP" yelled Ying Ma. Ching Wu curled up and cried. The man kicked her again "SHE SAID GET UP" Ching Wu yelled in pain. She slowly got up on her knees facing the man. He smirked and said " Go ahead now, taste it." He suddenly looked at me and winked. "Don't worry honey, you're going to be next."

Honey

We were left in a room on a boat. Its been a few days now and they have not fed us. We are starving. All I can really think about a bowl of soft, warm, sweet, white, rice. To help stop thinking about food I got to know my roommates. Ching Wu is 13, So So was 10, Ah Wei is 7 and Ah Ying is 5. Wei and Ying are sisters who are orphans from an orphanage not far from mine. They don't know what happened to their parents. So So was also from the same orphanage and her parents had given her up like mine. Ching Wu's parents had died when she was 10. Her aunt, who was raising her for the last 3 years, sold her off.

Suddenly that mean lady burst into the room holding a bottle of honey with a man following behind her.
"It is time to introduce myself. I'm Ying. You will all call me Ying Ma. As you well know, your mother and father hate you and that is why you are orphans. Out of the kindness of my heart I decided to take you into my care and..tsk..then give you off to someone else who wants you more." She smiles. "So from now on I will be the one who will feed you and give you a place to live and all you have to do in return is make me money." She smiles again. "So, your probably wondering why I haven't fulfilled my part in the bargain, food. WELL this is the start of your training." Ying Ma lifts up her arm and dangled the bottle of honey in the air and then places it on the table next to her. "It's supper time girls, Tao" She nudges her head "Get up here and drop your pants."

Burn

Finally, oh FINALLY someone came to open the crate. The sound of each nail being plied out of the wood never sounded so sweet, never sounded so beautiful. The anticipation for relief was so overwhelming that tears overflowed my eyes. The lid flew off, and light burst into the crate. My eyes burned trying to readjust. While squinting my eyes, I saw a black figure approach us. One by one the figure lifted us out of the crate and dropped us to the floor. Blood rushed up and down my body. The heat of my blood burned my leg and toes. I grimaced and groaned in agony. I lay on the ground wanting to move, wanting to see, but I was so paralyzed. I am a snail covered in salt.

Nails

How long has it been? 10 hours maybe 15? The doors finally opened. The fresh breeze filtered in. I closed my eyes. It must be a sign from heaven. I opened my eyes and I saw that woman by the door. I guess I was wrong. She told us to get out of the truck. One following another we got out. Finally I saw my faceless friends. Including myself there were 5 of us. 2 were younger than I was, 1 was around the same age, and the last girl was oldest.

We were at the pier. It was very dark out. If it wasn't from the ripples in the water, I wouldn't have been able to tell between the sky and the ocean.

Sitting in front of us was a medium sized crate. The woman told us to get in.
The crate suddenly looked smaller than it did a few seconds ago.

"What you think I have all night? Get in." The woman said as she nudged her head towards the crate.
The oldest girl said "But there’s five of us, we can't fit."
"Well make it fit. Don't see any other crates here do you?"
"But we just sat in the truck for so long, and I'm so hungry..." I whined
She walked over and slapped me.
"Didn't I tell you this before you rotten pig? You eat when I tell you to eat. I DON'T like to repeat myself." She slapped me again. "Get in NOW...ugh dealing with retards."
We each went in one after another. We folded ourselves as tightly as we could. Four of us had our backs to the wall. The youngest and smallest girl was placed in the middle which helped push ours knees in closer to our bodies.
My body was sore and the new sitting position started to hurt. All of us started to murmur and not before long, most of us were crying.
"I don’t want to hear any of your noises, you hear?" said the woman. “If I hear one whimper out of this box, I promise, I won't hit you." she smiled and paused. “I will just throw this crate out into the ocean and watch you drown”
I choked up my tears. We all fell silent, except for the little one who had a harder time. Two of us quickly covered her mouth.
"Good. I'll see you in a few hours." The woman put the lid over the crate, and, soon enough, we heard the nails hammered in. One. Two. Three. Four....